Lacklustre date wasn't a total loss: Dating Diaries
Judy is a 48-year-old account manager who lives in the west end. She says “My go-to ensemble is a pair of dark jeans and a bright top. I like bold colours, because they reflect my personality.” Judy says she is “Outgoing and fun-loving. I love to throw parties, especially costume parties.” She adds “I love dancing, live music, theatre, meeting friends for coffee, and camping, hiking, and travelling.” Judy says “I’m looking for someone who is kind, adventurous, and funny.”
I met Matt online. He lived outside of the city, but not too far, and seemed nice enough. I was intrigued by his love of the outdoors, camping and wildlife. After we had messaged for a little while, he invited me out for lunch.
I arrived on time and looked around for a guy, who would be alone and about 50ish. Having been in the online-dating scene for a while, I knew that the profile picture that’s provided isn’t always representative of what someone looks like.
I found my target and, as I usually do, went up and said “…Matt?” He looked a little surprised, and said “Yes?” I sat down and introduced myself and asked how he was. I found it a little strange that he had started eating without me, but you really do meet all kinds of people when you’re dating online.
Since he seemed a bit quiet and shy, I made most of the conversation. I’m a very outgoing and smiley person, so I’m used to it. Eventually, maybe 10 minutes in, he said something about living close by that didn’t make sense, since I knew from our conversations online that he lived out of town. I said “Wait a minute… Where do you live?” He told me, and I said “I think I have the wrong Matt!” I suddenly realized why at different points in our conversation he had seemed perplexed. We both started laughing. He told me he assumed we had met before through his business and had been wracking his brain trying to place me.
I asked Other Matt if he minded if I ordered a coffee while I waited for Original Date Matt to arrive, although at that point I was hoping he wouldn’t show up at all.
Other Matt and I shared our life stories. He’s an entrepreneur and I found him to be a fascinating person. I was so interested to hear about how he had built up his businesses. Hard-working people really impress me. He also seemed like a kind, caring, interesting and resourceful guy. I learned that his wife had died not that long ago. When he spoke about her, it was obvious how much he missed her. He seemed to have a wonderful relationship with his kids.
We were really enjoying ourselves when I saw Original Date Matt coming through the door 20 minutes late. I greeted him from the table as he walked in, and said “Hi Matt, meet Matt.” With a laugh, I explained the situation to him, but he didn’t really seem amused. I reluctantly said goodbye to Other Matt and followed Original Date Matt to another table. He didn’t apologize for being late.
It didn’t go very well, to say the least. Original Date Matt talked all about himself and my mind was mostly on Other Matt. When the waitress put the bill in the middle of the table, Original Date Matt didn’t touch it for 15 minutes. Finally, he took it and asked “What should I do with this?” I was confused, and said “Well, what would you like to do with it?” When I left, knowing I would never see Original Date Matt again, I saw that Other Matt had already left.
I could not stop thinking about Other Matt and decided to try to get in touch with him. The next day I went back to the restaurant and left a note with the waitress, with my number. The waitress told me that Other Matt and I had been the talk of the restaurant staff.
He called me the next day.
Judy rates her date (out of 10): 9
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